The Post Christmas/Pre-Holiday Blog Dump

Ok, all you folks out there in teh internets. I'm heading out for a couple of weeks and you can just forget about any kind of updating on the blog. I have better things to do in Ireland than sit in internet cafes (although my parents seem to think I should be emailing them every day - right). To keep you amused, here are the links that I've found over the last few weeks.

on Flickr - Photo Sharing!
My favorite internet-celebrity hedgehog, Clementine, having her picture taken for Xmas:


A couple more signs I'd like to add to the hedgie collection:
Duvberg on Flickr - Photo Sharing!


on Flickr - Photo Sharing!


And, in the best of all possible worlds: Hedgehog graffiti:
Hedgehog and boomboxes on Flickr - Photo Sharing!


Cute Overload! :)
The best Cute Overload of Late:
You're sucking my eyeball out (I love giraffes!)
Dainty Paws (hegie-licious)
Waaaay too many joke possibilities

And of course, the best from I Can Has Cheezburger. I'm not sure how I'd get through the day without the laughs ICHC provides me....
Ur flavr. It hurtz me. « Lolcats ‘n’ Funny Pictures - I Can Has Cheezburger?
My interest « Lolcats ‘n’ Funny Pictures - I Can Has Cheezburger?
the hand « Lolcats ‘n’ Funny Pictures - I Can Has Cheezburger?
the modelz « Lolcats ‘n’ Funny Pictures - I Can Has Cheezburger?
curious kitteh « Lolcats ‘n’ Funny Pictures - I Can Has Cheezburger?
BACON « Lolcats ‘n’ Funny Pictures - I Can Has Cheezburger?
This is the pick of the month!!


The best posts from some of my favorite blogs:
Pre-holiday Fluff Cavalcade Five: A Very Obese Bird « Shapely Prose
The Future Ain’t Bright - Fat Doctor
Greta Christina's Blog: "The Lord is spanking us"
Life, What the hell is going on?: Stoopid People.
Life, What the hell is going on?: Just a thought...
Life, What the hell is going on?: Quick! Get the Lysol!
Out of Character: P.S. Fire everyone in your marketing department immediately.
SNAFU-ed .... Subtle Butt Disposable Gas Neutralizers: $9.95 for Peace of Mind
SNAFU-ed .... Need a Good Holiday Gift? "Reserve a Spot in Heaven" for a Friend!
Spaghetti Harvest » Crazy is not as crazy does.

John A. Wheeler

"If you haven't found something strange during the day, it hasn't been much of a day."

• Link

SheFinds.com - A Body Scrub That Really Works


From Overheard in the Office:

Chewbacca's Agent Finally Snaps

By Djlindee
on Employees

Worker bee: Your poor interpersonal communication skills are not my fault. They are my problem, because I have to deal with you, but they are not my fault.

519 Westport Parkway
Grapevine, Texas

Overheard by: DeadEyeDusty

Relax -- That's Just Canadian for "Good Morning"

By Djlindee
on Customer Service

Overworked CSR: Sir, at any point in our conversation today did I provide you with my name?
Customer: No.
Overworked CSR: Good -- fuck you [hangs up].

Toronto, Ontario
Canadia

Allow Me to Demonstrate

By Djlindee
on Dumb Employees

Manager: What motivates you to do your best job possible?
Interviewee: Well, I don't do anything half-assed... Yeah, I like to put my whole ass into everything I do.

1158 Howard Street
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: Kirsten

From Overheard in New York:

But My Bench Press Is Up 50 Pounds!

Girl #1: Are you going to call me on my birthday? Huh? Huh?
Girl #2: What is it, the 23rd?
Girl #1: No!
Girl #2: Oh, the 24th.
Girl #1: Yeah.. If my friends don't blindfold me and get me wasted...
Girl
#2: Oh... Yeah, I will call you. Listen, I'm sorry I'm not more chatty.
I just got out of the hospital and the doctors put me on steroids,
which have the unfortunate effect of turning me into a total cunt.

--Olive Garden, Times Square

How Could You Not Love This Town?

Cashier: How are you?
Customer: Do you want the honest answer?
Cashier: Yes.
Customer:
I feel like the business end of a donkey. I am extremely hungover and
did a mountain of cocaine last night. Now I have to make dinner for a
68-year-old gay artist who is trying to fuck me.
Cashier: I'm... sorry.
Customer:
And the woman I love is in another state pregnant with her
ex-boyfriend's baby, and I wish the baby was mine. And I'm sleeping
with a dominatrix. And it's all true.

--Whole Foods

Difficult to Flatter, Too

Girl with petition: You look like a nice guy!
Suit: You're fucking right I am! [Keeps walking.]

--68th & Broadway

Overheard by: Pierre Fresnay

The Giant Ones Who Live in the Sewers Are Especially Nasty

Queer #1: Christians are the most vile creatures on this planet.
Queer #2: Shhh... They'll hear you!

--13th St, between Greenwich & 7th Ave

From Overheard Everywhere:

She Won't Accept the Solution I Worked Out

Nerdy Asian guy: My friend is having a problem...
Drunk Asian guy: Can you solve it with your penis?

UCLA
California

Overheard by: Amused

The Cell Reception Is Atrocious

Frustrated
mom: For the love of God, stop crying! If you don't stop, I'm going to
shove you back in my uterus, close my legs, and never let you out!
Crying little boy: No! I don't like it in there!

San Francisco, California

The Best from Boing Boing:
Web Zen: bacon zen - Boing Boing
KnitML: standards-defined knitting patterns - Boing Boing
Injured hedgehogs and cute/sad photo - Boing Boing
Collector asks for your 1968 pennies - Boing Boing
Secret photo archives of the Mutter Museum: haunting book of Victorian pathological curiosities - Boing Boing


http://fantasygoat.livejournal.com/


http://loltheist.com/2007/12/21/may-his-noodly-appendage-grace-your-drapes-this-season/

Honey, this one is for you. I know you love this sign:

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I have been neglecting the link-y goodness

Holy shit, how is it possibly already the end of November? Now that YEAR END is upon us, I need to actually start getting myself together...not only do I have a metric fuck-ton of work, but in four short weeks I am heading to IRELAND for my honeymoon...and I have nothing planned thus far. :)

So, while I procrastinate a bit more (this time from doing laundry), here are a whole bunch of links I've saved up over the last few weeks.

Embroidery Swap - Patch #4 on Flickr - Photo Sharing!

Awesome. Free form, or a pattern? Should I get out my rusty embroidery skills and try this one out? Wait...wasn't I the one just talking about too much to do??

Wait. Even more awesome: hedgie graffiti

hedgehog on Flickr - Photo Sharing!

Here is me on a swelly day:

Cute Overload! :)



A Story: I haz one.
I saw this picture and thought of one of my high school boyfriends, Chad. He was such a terrible kisser that on our last date, when we had driven up to the lake to make out, I actually said things like, "My goodness...it's almost 8 o'clock. I'd better be getting home!" Yes, that bad. This is kind of what he looked like when he was coming at me for a kiss:
Sweet, crying Baby Jebus, do I love I Can Has Cheezburger. Here's another one, which perfectly describes my day at work:
i try to put on a happy face « Lolcats ‘n’ Funny Pictures - I Can Has Cheezburger?


And some links from the fatosphere. Have I mentioned lately how much happier I am since I decided to love myself just the way I am?
Jumping Through Hoops for Health Insurance | Big Fat Blog
Bias, much? at BABble
Big Fat Delicious: I'm in health warning fatigue: opinion
F-Words: Technically it's not evil - just monstrous
Every Woman Has an Eating Disorder: The Vagina Dialogues
Reality vs. Relativism « Shapely Prose
Body frustration at BABble

And in the crafty goodness world, this is just plain awesome. It's like a crafty advent calendar....whip up » Blog Archive » A Month of Tutorials

Here's how to give a gift to a reader...or not....Bibliolatry: Bibliolatrist's Holiday Gift Guide, 2007

The Hamster Wheel: Overheard
I especially like the picture that he choose to go with it...

Will Durst

"I hate the outdoors. To me the outdoors is where the car is."

not martha
Must remember to use these recipes...and then put the finished goods in these boxes....

What I’ve learned from cats: Davezilla

Dilbert Comic Strip Archive - Dilbert.com - The Official Dilbert Website by Scott Adams - Dilbert, Dogbert and Coworkers!


LOLTheist: Blasphemy is Teh Funneh » Blog Archive » Today Wisconsin, tommorrow the world!


LOLTheist: Blasphemy is Teh Funneh » Blog Archive » Billboard, billboard on the wall, who’s the mightiest of them all?



Consumer Reports corrects "restless leg" drug TV ad - Boing Boing
And THIS, gentle readers, is one of the many reasons that drug companies should not be allowed to advertise. This restless leg syndrome and chronic dry eye....why aren't we working on real fucking diseases?? I better have one of these to calm me down...

A sign that is posted at my work. Ok, it's not, but it should be:
















My mom and I like to go to antique shows/flea markets. At the ones at the Fairgrounds, and sometimes elsewhere, there is a dealer that has a "garden shed." Gosh, if I didn't know better, I'd think that the two holes in the handy "shelf" were for another purpose...I saw this on my Mpls. Flickr feed this morning, and it made me think that this would be the perfect urban "garden shed".
DSC_1284 on Flickr - Photo Sharing!

So, I thought the best bacon gig in town was the Bacon Happy Hour, but now I find out at about this at Manny's....Best Bacon Ever on Flickr - Photo Sharing!


Damn Cool Pics: The Hanging Coffins of Sagada

Woman dies from religious snakebite incident, family sues hospital at Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster

an affirmation of hope at Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster


license plate at Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster



In America, Nonbelievers Find Strength in Numbers at Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster

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Old, Old Ones

Boing Boing: People committing eternal sin on YouTube

The topic of some debate on Flickr - Photo Sharing!
I'm for dessert.


And what would the weekly blog dump be without Love Graffiti?
buddha*hearts on Flickr - Photo Sharing!

The Vatican's product recall. - By Timothy Noah - Slate Magazine

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Moving....

....Blogger isn't doing it for me either. Upon recommendation and research, I'm moving on up to Wordpress. You can now see me here: http://dihasstories.wordpress.com/

C'mon...go there.

(Well, at least set up your RSS feed...nothing new is there yet. I'm moving all the archives and stuff over...)

Avoidance of Real Work with a Quiz

Your EQ is 140

50 or less: Thanks for answering honestly. Now get yourself a shrink, quick! 51-70: When it comes to understanding human emotions, you'd have better luck understanding Chinese. 71-90: You've got more emotional intelligence than the average frat boy. Barely. 91-110: You're average. It's easy to predict how you'll react to things. But anyone could have guessed that. 111-130: You usually have it going on emotionally, but roadblocks tend to land you on your butt. 131-150: You are remarkable when it comes to relating with others. Only the biggest losers get under your skin. 150+: Two possibilities - you've either out "Dr. Phil-ed" Dr. Phil... or you're a dirty liar.

What's Your EQ (Emotional Intelligence Quotient)?

I had no idea I was this freaking adorable

More questions from my Fluffy Ruffles, Sarah

1) Airline carryon regulations being what they are, let's imagine that in the not-too-distant future, you aren't allowed to carry any luggage on board - only that which can fit in your pockets or on your person. You win a trip to Australia (which you decide you are going to take). What few essentials come on the plane with you?

Luckily, I have lots of room on my person, and things with pockets (or that would shortly have pockets should this become an issue). First and foremost: video iPod for movies, songs, and the last month of This American Life. A mass-market-sized book. A small knitting project. Lip balm. Hey, that’s about all I take on a plane anyway!

2) Pickles or olives, and why?

I don’t see any particular reason to discriminate against either. I am apparently one of the very few people that loves both. Give me green olives to eat on their own, black on a pizza, and pickles under almost any circumstances.

3) Do you remember your first @yahoo/@hotmail/etc. address? If so, what was it? Do you remember when you got it, and why you picked that name?

It was “linnehan” – my first email address at Mankato State. Email was still all new and shit, so I didn’t really know what I was signing up for! I picked that name because (duh) it was my last name, and I didn’t know I could do anything cool. Later that year they got all standardized and picked our names for us. Boo.

4) Describe the outfit you are least proud of being photographed in. (bonus points if the photograph still exists. You win if you can post that photo on your blog).

There are so many bad photographs of me that exist that I can’t really begin to name them all. This one, though, is way up on the list of Horrible…I’m not sure what possessed me to think that way too big pink dress, with pink stockings, and black shoes was a good idea. I may look like hell most of the time, but at least I’ve learned not to do this again. (PS: I win)

5) After reeling about in anarchy for an undisclosed amount of time, your close friends and allies establish the new world order of government in your country. They ask you to take a governmental leadership role. Which role do they ask you to take, and why?

Fucking A! It’s about time we were in charge of the world! I’d have to say that my job would be Chief Kvetcher. I don’t really want to work that hard, but I’m sure gonna bitch about everything!

Questions from the Lovely Jana

1. suppose, for totally moral but still illegal reasons, you've killed a man. where do you hide the body?

It kinda depends on how I’ve killed him, and what marks it’s left. If I’ve been smart, and made it look like a natural death (what with all the access I have to do things like that), I’d leave him at home, looking like he croaked in front of the TV or in bed. If I’ve done some damage, then I’m gonna want him somewhere that he’s going to rot soon…maybe the woods, with a bit of acid for good measure, a la the Romanovs?

2. if you were only allowed 3 pairs of shoes for the rest of your life, what shoes would they be and why?
Frankly, I hate shoes, and pretty much only have three pair anyway. This is easy! One pair of squishy comfortable sandals, one pair of squishy comfortable boots (probably knee-high so I can wear them with both pants and skirts, since they are my only winter pair) and one pair of black dress shoes.

3. if, instead of going to work next monday, you had to relive a day from your childhood, what would it be?
The day that my parents announced that they were getting divorced, and asked who I wanted to live with. I totally should have gone with my dad. Ah, well.

4. suppose that through a combination of apocalyptic disaster and spontaneous collective memory loss, the human race no longer has the means or knowledge to brew beer. what do you drink when you get home from work?
Although I enjoy a good beer, my tummy doesn’t like it s’much, so as long as we are still creating wine and Bailey’s, I’ll be all good.

5. the perfect chocolate chip cookie: chewy or crunchy?

The perfect chocolate chip cookie is made by the recipe I got from my mother, which is basically a bunch of chocolate chips and nuts held together by a bit of sugar and butter. They are neither chewy or crispy, but that perfect in-between consistency. Mmmm…..

Want your own list of five questions? Drop me a comment and ask for them!

Damn, I love I Can Has Cheezburger

Check out the original here.